How to regain focus from distraction as a 1-person business.

Over the holidays I realised something pretty confronting.

The thing getting in the way of my business isn’t lack of skill, knowledge, or even confidence.

And it’s definitely not other people or competitors.

It’s distraction.

It’s me staying up until 1am scrolling on my phone when I’m already knackered.

It’s not giving my brain the space it needs to actually think, wander and come up with ideas that feel like mine. It’s not resting properly because, if I’m honest, I’m a bit terrified of feeling bored.

And then feeling so overwhelmed that I can't even respond to a pal's text.

Which is wild 'cos I know I can focus.

I’ve done some intense things in my life that required deep presence, silence and commitment. I don’t lack willpower or depth.

But this little device in my pocket?

It’s a different beast entirely, I keep telling myself I can out-willpower it. Meanwhile my attention is slowly leaking out of me, day by day.

I watched a film the other night, The Ballad of a Small Player and it hit uncomfortably close to home. (Okay, I'm no gambling addict running from serious fraud... but the premise remains the same.)​​

That constant chasing of the next thing, the next hit, the next tiny promise of relief.

“If I just stay up a bit longer…”

“If I just scroll a bit more…”

“If I just let the next episode play…”

And somehow after that, I’ll feel calm, satisfied, back in control.

Spoiler: I never do.

When you’re building something like a business, or trying to make creative work that actually matters to you, you need your brain cells intact. And mine have been quietly rotting away in the glow of the screen, it doesn’t feel like rest but doesn’t feel like living either.

I used to say I was “recovering from burnout”, and that was true. I needed the pendulum to swing. I needed softness. I needed to stop.

But too much of anything eventually stops helping.

Somewhere along the line, rest turned into stagnation.

And that’s been harder to admit.

So, on the edge of turning 38, I’m calling myself out. Gently, with compassion but honestly.

And weirdly facing it has made me feel more alive than I have in a long time.

I’m not going all in. I know my 0–100 tendencies too well for that. January is about warming the engine, not flooring it.

And step one is embarrassingly simple: turning the phone off at night and letting myself sleep properly again.

If any of this feels familiar, you’re not broken. You’re not lazy. You’re just human, trying to build something meaningful in a world that’s very good at stealing your attention.

Here’s to a steadier, more intentional year ahead and a truck-ton more sleep.

And to doing it without abandoning ourselves in the process.

Happy New Year.

Rosie 💛